santa banta ;3

61. Santa-Beta agr tm fail ho jao to mujhe papa mt kehna
(Some days later)
Papa-Bete result ka kya hua?
Santa-Dimag kharab mt kr "MangiLal


62. Santa: Agr tmhe kuch ho gya to mai Pagal ho jaunga.
Jeto: Dusri shadi to nhi kroge?
Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kr skta hai..




63. Masterji: kl school kyu nhi aya.
Santa: Gir gya tha or lg gayi.
Masterji: kaha gire, kaha lagi?
Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur ANKH lg gyi..



64. Santa: "God, if u give me 100 rs, I will donate 50 rs in tmpl".
(After waliking sm distance, he finds a 50 rs note)
Santa: "Shame on u God, u don't even trust me a little? u hv already takn ur share!"





65. Master: Mai tenu kutte pe essay likhne ho
keha tha, Likh k kyu nhi liya ?
Santa: Ki krda master g,
kahi bhi mai kutte pe Pen rkha wo bhagya!!!


66. Santa: I’m a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What’s he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they r studying him!


67. Banta: Truck dekhkr tm kapte kyu ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekr bhag gya tha, hr bar lgta hai jaise usko vaps krne aya hai.


68. Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS: “Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back: “When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: “Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

69. Santa:Papa aaj meri Girl4nd ki birhday he. Use kya du..?
Papa:Dekhne me kaisi hai?
Santa:Mast hai..
Papa:Mera mobile number de de!


70. Sardar to his friend.. I kiss my wife everyday before i go to office..
& u?
Friend: i kiss ur wife after u go to office.
Sardar: ha ha ha..i m the first..



71. 1 Chor Santa ka mobile le k bhag raha tha
Santa:Bhag sale Bhag bhag
Charger toh mere pas hai


72. 2 men were searching for their lost wife in a festival.
Santa:What does your wife look like?
Banta:She is 5'7", 36-24-36 sexy figure, fair, sweet, beautiful, green sexy eyes, brown hair, and yours?
Santa: Forget mine, let us look for yours.


73. Santa: Will U marry, after I die.
Jeeto: No, I will live with my sister. Jeeto: Will U marry, after I die.
Santa: No, I will also live with your sister.


74. Judge: Why were u arrested?
Santa: For shopping early.
Judge: Well, that's not a crime. Anyway, how early were u shopping?
Santa: Before the shop opened.


75. SANTA Ur son is Dead.Aftr Hearing Dis Santa jumps frm 50th floor.
Wen he reachd 35th Flr he think "I dnt hav Son"
20th Floor:
I'm not married
&
3rd Floor:
Shit! I'm BANTA.



76. Santa: Mere pass gaddi,bungla,paisa hai..tere pass kya hai?
Banta:Mere pass bhi gaddi,bungla,paisa hai
Santa:Mar gaye..Phir apni Maa kiske pass hai?


77. Sardar is driving a jeep in jungle.
Tourist: If lion follows very close to us then how can we escape?
Sardar:Give right indicator & take left turn.:-)



78. A Tamilian call up sardar and asks ' tamil therima??'
Santa got mad, angrily replied..
'Hindi tera baap!!!'


79. SLAM BOOK filled by Santa.

1.Strength:My wife,Jeeto.
2.Weakness:Banta ' s wife,Preeto.
3.Oppurtunity: When Banta is on tour.
4.Threat:When I am on tour

80. Santa: "Madam these undergarments will look nice on U"
Lady: How can U be so sure?
Santa: i'have done diploma in interior designing


81. Once Santa was trying 2 impress a young lady.
Santa:I have seen u some where.
Lady:Possible,i am a nurse working in MENTAL HOSPITAL!!


82 .Santa: Give Me An Idea
To Become Poor
Banta: Make A Hindi
Film With Himesh As
Hero ..
Santa: I Asked Idea To
Become Poor Not A
Beggar .. ;->



83. Santa: Why Do Girls Look Beautiful? Is It Real Or Due To Make Up?
Banta: All False.
Girls Look Beautiful Because Boys Have Good Imagination



84. Teacher: Who's A Terrorist?
Santa: Terrorist Is A Tourist Who Comes From Other CouNtry To Celebrate Diwali iN Our CouNtry.



85. Man: How was your exam today ?
Sardar: Fine, except for one question which was difficult
Man: Which one ?
Sardar: What is the past tense of THINK ?
I thought..i thought ..i thought about it and wrote THUNK ;-)


86. Computer teacher to sardar:What are the three latest versions of java ? Sardar: . . . . . . . . MarJava,MitJava,LutJava..


87. Friend to sardar:
Yar Sir Ka Msg Aaya Hai K Aaj Extra Class Hogi Kya Karun?
.
.
..
...Sardar:-'Message sending failed' likh ke bhej de....



88. Ek sardar ko koi mobile pe tang kar raha tha, Sardar ne new sim khareed kar usko sms kiya: "MAINE WO NUMBER BAND KAR DIYA HAI AB TERA BAAP BHI MUJHE TANG NAHI KAR SAKTA "



89. Sardar:Mere liye koi achi si larki ka rishta bata. Friend:Yaar ek larki hai B.com ki, Sardar:Yaar Qom koi bhi ho par larki parhi likhi honi chahiye.




90. Pathan:Yaar tum subha se zameen khod rahe ho kya baat hai aakhir ? . . . Sardar:Yaar abba kehta hai maine unka naam mitti mein mila dia hai so mein wohi dhoond raha hun.