121.. Dad santa:tu exam mai pas ho ya fail,mai tujhe bike jaru dilaunga...
Banta: kaun si bike?
Santa: Pas hua to pulsar colg jane k liye,fail hua to rajdut dudh bechne k liye...
122. Santa: yar,cal rate itna hai ki smbhl-smbhl kr phone lagana padta hai..
Banta: mai to hr roj 10-15 phone aise hi laga deta hai aur mera paisa bhi nahi lagta..
santa: woh kaise?
Banta: mai customer care mai no. lagata hu...
123. Santa: agar patni k pita ko sasur krhte hai to gf k pita ko kya kahenge?
Banta: agar woh apni beti ki shadi tmse krnr ko raji ho gaye to sasur, nahi to assur..
124. Santa Banta SMS, chutkule sms in Hindi, humour, jokes, are juicy spicy ingredient of life when think about santa banta a big laugh play on your face. Enjoy comedy Ka Tadka - Santa Banta comedy SMS free.
125. 2 Hijade ek shaadi ki badhai dene gaye.
Haye haye mai to 1100 lungi.
Dusri Boli mai to 2100 lungi.
Peeche se Santa bola Abey 2310 le lo usme FM bhi hai! new 2011 wala!
126. Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, cleaning home and washing clothes.
Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.
127. Santa aur Jeeto mai larai ho gayi, Santa ghar se chala gaya
Santa raat ko phone pe: Khane mai kya hai?
Jeeto: Zehar
Husb: Mai dair se aaonga, tum kha kar so jana
128. Santa aadhi raat ko apni moti bibi se bola k sisak sisak kemarna theek hai ya ek dum.
Jeeto: Ek dum.
Santa: To apni dusri tang bhi mujh per rakh do.
129. Santa opened A College. Guess the Name of College?
The Name of the the College was: WOMEN`S COLLEGE FOR BOYS
130. Banta: Wife agar husband ko naukar samjhe to husband ko kyakarna chahiye?
Santa: Zyada kuch nahi, do char ghar aur pakad lene chahiye.
131. Q: How do you recognize Santa's son, Pappu, in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erasesthe board.
132. Santa to Jeeto: Kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul Gobar jaisaswaad hai.
Jeeto, maatha peette huye: Hey bhagwan! Na jane inhone kya-kyakha ke dekha hua hai.
133. Santa Banta Se : Yaar mere Pet Mai Gas Hai…!!!
Banta : Achha hua Petrol Nahi Hai Warna ONGC wale kua khod dete!
134. Doctor:Kamjori hai, Fruite khaya karo chilke sahit
after 1 hour
Santa: Mere Pet me Dard ho raha hai
Doctor: Kya khaya tha?
Santa: Pineapple, chilke sahit
135. Santa: Sabse bhari durghatna kya ho sakti hai
Banta: Agar koi potty dhone ke dibbe me Tejab dal de..
136. In n exam, a gal sitting on desk next to santa asked, "Mujhe is answer ki starting batado baki main likh lungi"
Santa said, "The answer of this question is, baki tum likhlo"
137. Santa: Mera ghar itna bada hai ki usme local train chalti hai.
Banta: Yeh to kuchh bhi nahi hai, mera ghar itna bada hai ki agar ek se dusre kone chale jaao to roaming lagti hai.
138. Teacher to Santa: is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiyaor karta hi gaya.
Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan...
139. Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?
Santa: Birla cement.
Banta: Kyun?
Santa: Kyunki is Cement mai jaan hai
140. a man to his friend-mai apna purse ghar pe bhul aya mujhe 1000rs ki jarurat hai
Banta-dost hi dost ke kaam ata hai ye le 10 rs riksha kar k purse le aa
141. Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
142. Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover iscrying furiously...
Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marryagain.
143. Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya.
Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi.
Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi?
Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi
144. Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi.
Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai?
Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi
145. Ek baar Santa Gangubai k ghar jata hai aur darwaza knock karta hai.
Gangubai: Kaun ?
Santa: Mai !
Gangubai: Main kaun?
Santa: Tu Gangubai
146. Jagjit Singh: Ye daulat bhi lelo.. ye shaurat bhi lelo.. ye daulat b lelo, ye shaurat b lelo...
Santa: Ye bechara bahut pareshan hai iski aurat bhi lelo
147. Santa to Son: "maths vich fail kyu hoya"..
Son: 1st day teacher kendi 5+3=8..
Agle din kendi 6+2=8..
fir kendi 4+4=8
ullu di pathi khud confusd hai mujhe kya padheygi..:-)
149. Beta:Papa Madam Ne aj Ek Sawal Poocha Jiska Jawab Sirf Mujhe malum Tha
Sardar:Mera Shona Puttar, Sawal Kya Tha ???
Beta:Madam Ne Pucha, Black Board K Paas Potty Kisne Ki Hai
150. Santa ke truck ke pichey likha tha, "chota parivar sukhi parivar"
aur uske nichey
Tinu, minu, chintu, chinky, pinky, guddu, guddi, sonu, monu, te sohan de papa di gaddi!!
151. Santa: Very Tasty, Aaj to tumhare ghar kheer kha kar majja aa gaya
Banta: Agar Billi muhn nahi marti to Kheer aur bhi achi banti .
152. Santa ne shampoo kharida.
Santa: iske sath jo gift hai do
Shopkeepe: iske sath koi gift nahi hai
Santa: jhoothe! ispe likha hai "Dandruff Free"
153. Interviewer: Whats d relation between Earth & Moon?
Santa: Brother & Sister
Inter: How?
Santa: Earth Dharti mata and Moon Chanda Mama.
154. Santa Ne Apne 6 Mnth K Baby Ki B'day party arrange ki, kisi ne pucha: 6 month k baby ka B'day kese?
Santa:Hum Semster System Ko Folow Karte Hai....:-)
155. After eating fish Santa Singh never drinks water!
Coz
He feared that fish will come alive and start swimming in his stomach!! ;-)
156. Santa- Agar nariyal k ped pe chadh jaun to Engg college ki ladkiyan dikh jayengi?
Banta- Zaroor!! Aur haath chhod dega to medical college ki bhi dikh jayengi
157. Santa : Judge Saab, Mujhe Divorce Chahiye
judge : Kyun?
Santa : Meri Biwi Ne 1 Saal Se Mujhse Baat Nahi Ki
Judge : 1 Bar Phir Sochle Beta, Aisi Biwi Nasib Walo Ko Milti Hai
158. Santa Bakri Le Kar Bus Mei Sawar Hua
To Logo Ne Uski Bahot Pitai ki
Santa: Mere Sath ek Lady Na Hoti To Tumhe Btata
159. SANTA : YAAR MERI BIWI MERE DOST KE SAATH BHAG GAYI
BANTA : BAHUT YAAD ATI HOGI USKI FIR
SANTA : HAAN YAAR BAHUT ACHA DOST THA MERA, BAHUT ACHA KAAM KIYA HAI USHNE.
160. Santa ne Banta se kaha, ”sabse bada challenge kya hai?”
Banta replied – answer sheet ko khali chod do aur last me likh dena,
paas kark dikha
Banta: kaun si bike?
Santa: Pas hua to pulsar colg jane k liye,fail hua to rajdut dudh bechne k liye...
122. Santa: yar,cal rate itna hai ki smbhl-smbhl kr phone lagana padta hai..
Banta: mai to hr roj 10-15 phone aise hi laga deta hai aur mera paisa bhi nahi lagta..
santa: woh kaise?
Banta: mai customer care mai no. lagata hu...
123. Santa: agar patni k pita ko sasur krhte hai to gf k pita ko kya kahenge?
Banta: agar woh apni beti ki shadi tmse krnr ko raji ho gaye to sasur, nahi to assur..
124. Santa Banta SMS, chutkule sms in Hindi, humour, jokes, are juicy spicy ingredient of life when think about santa banta a big laugh play on your face. Enjoy comedy Ka Tadka - Santa Banta comedy SMS free.
125. 2 Hijade ek shaadi ki badhai dene gaye.
Haye haye mai to 1100 lungi.
Dusri Boli mai to 2100 lungi.
Peeche se Santa bola Abey 2310 le lo usme FM bhi hai! new 2011 wala!
126. Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, cleaning home and washing clothes.
Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.
127. Santa aur Jeeto mai larai ho gayi, Santa ghar se chala gaya
Santa raat ko phone pe: Khane mai kya hai?
Jeeto: Zehar
Husb: Mai dair se aaonga, tum kha kar so jana
128. Santa aadhi raat ko apni moti bibi se bola k sisak sisak kemarna theek hai ya ek dum.
Jeeto: Ek dum.
Santa: To apni dusri tang bhi mujh per rakh do.
129. Santa opened A College. Guess the Name of College?
The Name of the the College was: WOMEN`S COLLEGE FOR BOYS
130. Banta: Wife agar husband ko naukar samjhe to husband ko kyakarna chahiye?
Santa: Zyada kuch nahi, do char ghar aur pakad lene chahiye.
131. Q: How do you recognize Santa's son, Pappu, in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erasesthe board.
132. Santa to Jeeto: Kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul Gobar jaisaswaad hai.
Jeeto, maatha peette huye: Hey bhagwan! Na jane inhone kya-kyakha ke dekha hua hai.
133. Santa Banta Se : Yaar mere Pet Mai Gas Hai…!!!
Banta : Achha hua Petrol Nahi Hai Warna ONGC wale kua khod dete!
134. Doctor:Kamjori hai, Fruite khaya karo chilke sahit
after 1 hour
Santa: Mere Pet me Dard ho raha hai
Doctor: Kya khaya tha?
Santa: Pineapple, chilke sahit
135. Santa: Sabse bhari durghatna kya ho sakti hai
Banta: Agar koi potty dhone ke dibbe me Tejab dal de..
136. In n exam, a gal sitting on desk next to santa asked, "Mujhe is answer ki starting batado baki main likh lungi"
Santa said, "The answer of this question is, baki tum likhlo"
137. Santa: Mera ghar itna bada hai ki usme local train chalti hai.
Banta: Yeh to kuchh bhi nahi hai, mera ghar itna bada hai ki agar ek se dusre kone chale jaao to roaming lagti hai.
138. Teacher to Santa: is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiyaor karta hi gaya.
Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan...
139. Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?
Santa: Birla cement.
Banta: Kyun?
Santa: Kyunki is Cement mai jaan hai
140. a man to his friend-mai apna purse ghar pe bhul aya mujhe 1000rs ki jarurat hai
Banta-dost hi dost ke kaam ata hai ye le 10 rs riksha kar k purse le aa
141. Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
142. Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover iscrying furiously...
Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marryagain.
143. Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya.
Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi.
Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi?
Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi
144. Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi.
Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai?
Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi
145. Ek baar Santa Gangubai k ghar jata hai aur darwaza knock karta hai.
Gangubai: Kaun ?
Santa: Mai !
Gangubai: Main kaun?
Santa: Tu Gangubai
146. Jagjit Singh: Ye daulat bhi lelo.. ye shaurat bhi lelo.. ye daulat b lelo, ye shaurat b lelo...
Santa: Ye bechara bahut pareshan hai iski aurat bhi lelo
147. Santa to Son: "maths vich fail kyu hoya"..
Son: 1st day teacher kendi 5+3=8..
Agle din kendi 6+2=8..
fir kendi 4+4=8
ullu di pathi khud confusd hai mujhe kya padheygi..:-)
149. Beta:Papa Madam Ne aj Ek Sawal Poocha Jiska Jawab Sirf Mujhe malum Tha
Sardar:Mera Shona Puttar, Sawal Kya Tha ???
Beta:Madam Ne Pucha, Black Board K Paas Potty Kisne Ki Hai
150. Santa ke truck ke pichey likha tha, "chota parivar sukhi parivar"
aur uske nichey
Tinu, minu, chintu, chinky, pinky, guddu, guddi, sonu, monu, te sohan de papa di gaddi!!
151. Santa: Very Tasty, Aaj to tumhare ghar kheer kha kar majja aa gaya
Banta: Agar Billi muhn nahi marti to Kheer aur bhi achi banti .
152. Santa ne shampoo kharida.
Santa: iske sath jo gift hai do
Shopkeepe: iske sath koi gift nahi hai
Santa: jhoothe! ispe likha hai "Dandruff Free"
153. Interviewer: Whats d relation between Earth & Moon?
Santa: Brother & Sister
Inter: How?
Santa: Earth Dharti mata and Moon Chanda Mama.
154. Santa Ne Apne 6 Mnth K Baby Ki B'day party arrange ki, kisi ne pucha: 6 month k baby ka B'day kese?
Santa:Hum Semster System Ko Folow Karte Hai....:-)
155. After eating fish Santa Singh never drinks water!
Coz
He feared that fish will come alive and start swimming in his stomach!! ;-)
156. Santa- Agar nariyal k ped pe chadh jaun to Engg college ki ladkiyan dikh jayengi?
Banta- Zaroor!! Aur haath chhod dega to medical college ki bhi dikh jayengi
157. Santa : Judge Saab, Mujhe Divorce Chahiye
judge : Kyun?
Santa : Meri Biwi Ne 1 Saal Se Mujhse Baat Nahi Ki
Judge : 1 Bar Phir Sochle Beta, Aisi Biwi Nasib Walo Ko Milti Hai
158. Santa Bakri Le Kar Bus Mei Sawar Hua
To Logo Ne Uski Bahot Pitai ki
Santa: Mere Sath ek Lady Na Hoti To Tumhe Btata
159. SANTA : YAAR MERI BIWI MERE DOST KE SAATH BHAG GAYI
BANTA : BAHUT YAAD ATI HOGI USKI FIR
SANTA : HAAN YAAR BAHUT ACHA DOST THA MERA, BAHUT ACHA KAAM KIYA HAI USHNE.
160. Santa ne Banta se kaha, ”sabse bada challenge kya hai?”
Banta replied – answer sheet ko khali chod do aur last me likh dena,
paas kark dikha
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